Friday, October 3, 2008

I Don't Have Actual Plans to Kill Anyone, FYI

I was reading this depressing magazine I regret subscribing to (The Sun) and there was an article written by a guy whose dad was sexually abused. I stared off into space for a few minutes and decided I could definitely shoot someone dead who I knew was a threat to children.

Is that bad? That I'm fairly certain I could kill someone and feel OK about doing it?

Juuuuuuust a thought.

Actually, I had a dream that made me realize I could probably kill someone.

Several months ago, I saw a movie in which a character suddenly raises their arm and shoots someone dead. A couple nights later, I dreamt there was a man who was going to hurt my husband. The person was an acquaintance, but once I realized he might want to hurt C, I knew what had to be done. The man walked into the room, and without even looking, I raised my arm and shot him dead. Then, I walked calmly into the next room. I plopped onto the couch beside my husband, who didn't know about any of these problems, and started a chit chatty conversation, feeling a little bad that I had this secret I couldn't share-- I knew C wouldn't approve of murder--, but knowing I had to do it.

It was a pretty vivid dream.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Oooooooookay. I had to go back and make sure that this wasn't one of those crazy pregnancy dreams. Those are the worst.

I too have similarly frightening feelings at the thought of people who could potentially hurt my girls. I think it's perfectly natural.