Breastfeeding After Breast Surgery

I am reading the Breastfeeding After Breast Surgery page on the La Leche League website and I am beyond inspired by what some women have done to keep their baby at the breast.

I love the following lines from a woman's story who breastfed after breast reduction surgery with a nursing supplementer:

Rebecca showed me how to place the tube next to my nipple so Gabriela would receive the milk in the bottle while she was breastfeeding. That was definitely not the solution I was expecting. But my husband, Elbert, was enthusiastic and supportive of trying new things. He helped me believe it would work. He washed those bottles hundreds of times, often in the middle of the night, and thanks to his support, we kept going.

The last conversation was with a dancer friend of mine. I was in a theater with Gabriela, getting ready to feed her. My friend asked if I had switched Gabriela to the bottle. I answered, "No, we are still using the SNS." She said she couldn't believe I used the device in public. I replied, "I have no reason to change the way my child is fed in or outside my home. I have no reason to be ashamed of it."

Another woman found that although she couldn't exclusively breastfeed her first baby after breast reduction surgery, she could with her second, because her milk ducts had reconnected!

Alex was still intensely nursing at age two-and-a-half, when I became pregnant. I consulted many times via email with Diana West, author of Defining Your Own Success: Breastfeeding After Breast Reduction Surgery (Available from the LLLI Online Store), as well as other La Leche League Leaders. The hope among all of us was that having an enthusiastic nurser would have given my milk ducts an opportunity to recanalize, restoring their flow so that I might be able to exclusively breastfeed this new baby. I had no idea the body was even capable of such repair. I was skeptical, but thrilled.

Ben was welcomed into this world five months ago. He weighs 19 pounds. Amazingly, he has only had his mama's milk. His brother gave him the gift of recanalized milk ducts and Ben has given his mother the gift of above average weight gain, to reassure me during those times of doubting my body. Both of my babies have given me the gift of trusting my body to heal and to provide sustenance in more ways than I had ever imagined possible. There are truly blessings all around!

It is just incredible what the human body can do, and what a mother can do with education, support and determination.

For a little more clinical detail, you can see this article by Diana West, the author of Defining Your Own Success: Breastfeeding After Breast Reduction Surgery.

And on the Breastfeeding After Breast Surgerypage, there are stories of continuing to breastfeed after other types of breast surgeries as well. Click here to read full entry.

What’s the Problem with Toddler Nursing?

This weekend at music class, my toddler was not quite himself. He was probably tired. Right in the middle of music class, he requested to nurse, which he NEVER does. I tried to distract him but he insisted, so I left the circle and faced a corner and sat and nursed him. He looked very drowsy and nursed all throughout a song with chimes and into the next song with some jingle bells. I turned and leaned against the wall so I was more comfortable. Plus, I didn’t want to make it look like I felt I was doing something horrible that needed to be hidden from view! Eventually he was done nursing and wanted to join the song.

During the two closing songs he asked to nurse again, so I backed up out of the circle and leaned up against the wall to nurse my out-of-sorts kid. I felt a little self conscious because I’d never seen anyone breastfeed in the class before, plus there were several dads there, but hey, this is Fairfield County CT, land of overachievers, and nursing is an “in” thing to do. I have actually gotten the sense over the past year that in this health-conscious, even slightly crunchy community, nursing an older baby- and even a toddler- is something people admire.

At the end of the class, the teacher, who I love, came over and said, “I think it’s so great that you’re nursing him. It’s so good for them. They get everything they need.”
I said something awkward like, “Well, it’s just easy! Although today I’m not wearing my proper clothes for it.” (I’d had to struggle with my regular bra and two layers of shirts.)
“Oh, but you were discreet,” she said, which made me realize that I sounded apologetic, which I didn’t mean to do, but I did feel a little awkward about broaching the non-nursing precedent that had been set in my 9 months or so of attending these classes. I was so happy that she took the time to make sure I knew she approved of my actions; I needed that boost. In the past two days I’ve gotten a couple negative comments about nursing, and her approval has buoyed me when I felt down.
Click here to read full entry.

WSJ Talking Crap About Breastfeeding

I just read a really irritating post in the Wall Street Journal blog about parenting. The post is called "The Economic Consequences of Breastfeeding." I had to reread the post a couple of times to figure out why it bugged me.

It starts, "Returning to the office after maternity leave isn’t easy, adding to the adjustment: To pump or not to pump. I’m not doing it. Before I came back to work this week, I decided that I would continue to nurse my daughter in the mornings only.

I’m well aware that breast milk is considered the optimal food for babies. That’s why I happily nursed for the past six months. But working moms may face stiff penalties for breastfeeding, a price that I’m not sure my family can afford. My job’s irregular schedule makes it impractical to pump milk at work. And given that my husband and I have financial goals, such as saving for retirement and a healthy portion of our daughter’s education costs, I don’t want to quit or downshift my career to accommodate a regular pumping or breastfeeding schedule.

There is a negative effect of breastfeeding on women’s employment status, says Phyllis Rippeyoung, assistant professor of sociology at Acadia University and co-author of a working paper about the economic consequences of breastfeeding. “In terms of long-term earnings, women who breastfeed less than six months have similar income trajectories to those who never breastfeed, but those who breastfeed for six months or longer have far steeper declines in income, mainly due to their increased likelihood of reducing their work hours or quitting,” Ms. Rippeyoung says. "

It just seems to me that the premise of this article is wrong- many moms CAN work pumping into their schedule, and many of them left comments stating so. I had another problem with the article- I felt it was giving false information about the nature of breastfeeding. Here is what I wrote- I was comment #139.

Two quotes in this article really bother me, because they are FALSE.

1. “For moms who have pain when the baby latches on, there are helpful professionals, but they demand a professional rate. A recent article in The New York Times described a certified lactation consultant who charges $200.”
The lactation consultants at my local hospital in Stamford CT provide FREE services in phone or in person to ANYONE who calls them. They also offer a mother’s group every week to anyone who wants to come. It bothers me to see something FALSE written in WSJ. The Stamford Hospital LCs, at no cost, have helped me breastfeed successfully for almost a year, and helped me figure out the best way to pump at work.
Click here to read full entry.

Making Breastfeeding and Daycare Work

It can be tough to make breastfeeding work with daycare.

In my case, my baby wants more milk than I can make. Guess what I say to that? Too bad. He can make it up when I pick him up. His doctor and my lactation consultant say the 8 oz I provide should be enough, so if that means I have to rush right from work to get him to feed him, I'm fine doing that until one year when he can take cow's milk.

I blogged previously about my having to persuade daycare that 8 oz was enough milk for him. (That was titled "Approaching 1 Year Breastfeeding: Stubbornness- and Support- Needed.") I can only pump 6, max 7 at work, so I even have to squeeze in extra pumping sessions to make that 8 oz. It's a pain in the butt, but my sights are set on my one year of breastmilk goal and I am forging ahead. My husband wonders if I'm thinking of myself or the baby, but you know what, I don't really expect anyone else to get how I feel about my goal. The baby's fine. 8 oz should be enough for him. He loves solid food, so all the medical professionals tell me that is enough milk.
Click here to read full entry.

Fathers as an Essential Breastfeeding Support

I just spoke to a friend who has made it to 3 weeks breastfeeding her baby boy despite cracked nipples, pain, and c-section recovery, in addition to the raging hormones and sleep deprivation that make the first few weeks so difficult.
I am so proud of her for making it this far. She said she never would have made it without the support of her husband. This reinforced the already high opinion I have of him. I have always thought he's fabulous, but to hear what a support he's been to her- well, that means a lot. My own husband was also a huge help with encouragement, caring for the baby while I napped, and bringing me water and whatever else I needed and wanted while breastfeeding. Oh- and he made ALL of of our dinners the first few weeks!

I wanted to give a shout out to my husband, my friend's husband, and all the other dads (and partners and families) who make the often difficult first few weeks of breastfeeding more manageable.

Another friend of mine has a friend who badly wanted to breastfeed, but her husband didn't think she could do it all herself. She ended up giving it up. Fathers and partners, and their opinions, mean more than they realize. I wish more moms knew they CAN do it. I never was sure I could, but I persevered through some pretty bad pain at 5 days with my husband's support and the help of my lovely lactation consulant. Most of us can't do it alone, and we have to ask for help from the right people if we want to succeed. Most of us CAN do it- but most of us need help. I've asked for so much help along the way- from my LC, from my friend Deirdre (a doctor and breastfeeding/pumping/working mom), from twitter friends, and my friend Olga when I needed a pep talk after a hard first week of pumping at work.

Wish I could write more, but need to run and get the house ready to feed TEN people, as my family is in town! Click here to read full entry.

Approaching 1 Year Breastfeeding: Stubbornness- and Support- Needed

It occurred to me this evening, as I was painstakingly pouring the 7.5 oz I painstakingly pumped at work today into 4 separate plastic baggies that I painstakingly labeled with date, ounces, and my baby's name... that trying to breastfeed for a full year takes stubbornness.

In the early days, I was stubborn when we almost tried some formula when the baby nursed and nursed and nursed from 10 pm to 1 am. We made the bottle, then I said, "Just one more nursing session."

I was stubborn at 5.5 months, when after the baby had a weeklong stomach bug and didn't nurse much, my supply really dropped (despite renting a hospital grade pump and pumping whenever I could get time), and I had to nurse the baby almost every hour or two for two weeks straight to get my supply back up. (Thank God I was not working, or I'm not sure I would have had the time and energy to get the supply back.)

I have always stubbornly stuck to the idea that breastmilk, and what I can make, should be good enough. (I must say I have been influenced by my fabulous and stubborn lactation consultants, who I simply adore. Holla, Stamford Hospital Lactation!)
Click here to read full entry.

I Approve of "Indiscreet" Breastfeeding

I really, really loved this article: "From Bashful to Brazen: The Indiscreet Breastfeeder's Manifesto." After a stressful experience where she was chastised by an older woman for feeding her screaming infant in the grocery store, the author becomes- well, a lactivist, I'd say. Someone who promotes breastfeeding by doing it in public. (And thereby normalizing it.)

I felt very proud of this woman for standing up for herself and her baby. A nursing mother should not have to hide away. It's so silly that some people are freaked out about breastfeeding. If an adult can't glance at another adult who's FEEDING A BABY AND PROPAGATING THE HUMAN RACE- well, that person can take a leap off a cliff as far as I'm concerned.

Here's author Sundae Horn's manifesto:
Indiscreet Breastfeeding Manifesto

I will nurse my child anytime, anywhere, no matter who is present or what I am wearing.
I will bare my breast with pride and confidence.
I will not apologize for nourishing and nurturing my child.
I will not smother my child with a napkin or blanket.
I will smile at everyone around me and ignore rude stares.
I will know that I am giving my child the perfect infant food from the most efficient, ecological, and economical delivery system.
I will know that I am giving my child the healthy start that is his or her birthright.
I will set an example for women and girls, educate the public, dispel breastfeeding myths, desexualize the breast, and make the world a better place, all through the simple act of feeding my child.

I love it. I pretty much do this too.

I would not say I "bare my breast" on purpose- I do try to latch the kid on quickly. But I'm not going to act like I'm SMUGGLING HEROIN INTO THAILAND when I'm just nursing, so I'm not going to try desperately to hide myself. My husband is not as bonkers as me about public breastfeeding, but he and I have very different aesthetics in general, so I try not to get upset that he's not as lactivist as I am. He doesn't love it when I breastfeed in restaurants, and he's entitled to his opinion. But when I'm out without him, I'm sure to breastfeed at will. Sorry, honey.

But yeah, I pretty quickly became a lactivist once I started breastfeeding- not that I'm going to tell other moms how to feed their babies- but in the same way, I don't want anyone telling me where and how to feed my kid.

It's handy that most of the moms I'm friends with, I met in my hospital's new moms group, which is run by a lactation consultant. All of us breastfed for at least the first few months. We went out for lunch after moms' group and broke out the nursing covers, learning how to breastfeed in public together. It was so cool. Most of them went back to work when their babies were three months old and most did not choose the rigors of pumping- I totally understand that. Pumping is exhausting and annoying. It's a true luxury to get to stay home with your kid and breastfeed at your leisure. Anyone who criticizes a working mom for not pumping deserves a brick to the head. (Oh shoot did I just say that? I watch too much true crime TV. What I mean is, it's hard to make breastfeeding work when you go back to work, especially if that job is not flexible.) Just as I am protective of nursing moms, I'm also protective of moms who decide to use formula.

Here's a segment from Sundae's article:

Since that day, I have nursed openly in some pretty amusing situations, including during an eye exam and while taking the written test for my driver's license. Neither the optometrist nor the DMV examiner asked me to stop. In fact, both were encouraging, if a little embarrassed, saying that it was a first for them, but that I should just go ahead and do what was best for my baby.
I have nursed while getting my hair cut and my oil changed. I have nursed in libraries, museums, and malls, at weddings and parties, in stores and waiting rooms, in line at the grocery store, and while waiting on customers in the bookstore where I work. Not to mention in restaurants, airports, parks, zoos, and the Morehead City Seafood Festival beer garden (I had juice, of course). Once I made myself at home on the patio furniture display at K-Mart. Another time I sat on the edge of the dairy case at the grocery store; a passing manager assured me I could sit there as long as I needed.

I think that's pretty friggin' cool.

Where have I nursed? On airplanes, in line at the airline ticket counter when baby was freaking and I was NOT about to let someone else get the seat I wanted, and at the emergency room while they were putting an IV in the baby when he was dehydrated from vomiting. He was screaming bloody murder, and one of the nurses shoved a pacifier at him. "He won't take that," I snapped, super frazzled, then I got the idea to give him the boob (the original pacifier). I leaned over the bed and tried to nurse him while 4 nurses stepped over and around me trying different things to get a vein. It was quite a scene, but the breast stopped the baby's screaming for a few seconds at least. Poor thing. Later on, one of the nurses goes, "That was really cool what you did." I got a lot of positive support from the nurses that day, including one who held the baby so I could pump, since he wasn't wanting to eat. That was in California, where I think they're pretty into breastfeeding. Here's a pic of him and me at the ER the SECOND time.

I dunno. I just don't think breastfeeding is something that should make other people upset or angry to see. I don't think kids are freaked out by it. Adolescent boys, maybe, but we certainly can't run the world based on the likes and dislikes of teen boys.

What kind of people are freaked out about breastfeeding? Just people I wouldn't like anyway, right?

I know I talk about breastfeeding, but I do it a million times a day, so it's on my mind. Click here to read full entry.

Quick Opinions on Parenting

(Because I'll NEVER get the time to write whole posts on the following topics.)

-- I like having pediatricians who don't tell me how and when to feed my baby and where he should sleep. If I want to nurse him at night I will. BUTT OUT.

Some old-fashioned peds are really weird about breastfeeding. They ask me how often I feed him a day, and I've realized that they think "Oh, I don't know, whenever," sounds weird. (Why must I count? Who cares? If he acts hungry, I feed him.) So, now I just say a number that sounds small but often. Today I said, "Five." Last month I said, "Like, six or seven." Because that's what one of them suggested the month before that when I said I didn't really know.
Click here to read full entry.

Chime In: Great Moments in Pumping

A friend posted on facebook, "Pumping on bathroom floor of a mental hospital." She's training in the medical field, so...
I was wondering what other crazy places you've pumped, or other pumping achievements?

So far, all I can offer is, I pumped during a crazy time in which my baby was vomiting a ton over a few days. I was on vacation in CA, so I had to locate a breastpump. I called around frantically to local hospitals, who gave me the home number of their lactation consultant, then I borrowed my sister's minivan to drive to the LC's house to get a quick lesson in pumping. And then I was off! I was so thankful for that Medela Lactina pump and that there was someone who could rent me one less than ten minutes from my sister's house. Click here to read full entry.

Reflections on Post Partum Hormones

The other day at La Leche League, a mom with a 2 week old baby quickly left after it started crying.
"She didn't have to leave, all babies cry!" someone said after the meeting ended.
"Yeah, but remember what it felt like when your brand new baby cried?" I said (you know me, always having some bossy opinion). "Like, your entire body heated up and you couldn't think of anything except solving the problem? Like, your brain went haywire because the hormones were coursing through your body? That's probably how she felt, and just needed to leave."

Man, thinking back to those days... I'm glad I don't feel things that intensely any more. I think I had a relatively easy time in those first few weeks, because I had a lot of help from my husband and then my mom. But it was still a hard time. Your body feels horrible, and you're so tired... I remember how strong those hormones felt. I would cry because my pelvis hurt and I was sick of asking for help, and I would cry because I didn't want to put my baby in daycare (when he was weeks old, I was obsessing about what was coming up in 9-10 months- it's not quite rational, but you can't fight that feeling).

I honestly don't remember too much about those first weeks, and I'm kinda glad about that. I do recall being up at 3 am with the baby, and reading breastfeeding books, and feeling like I was in Navy SEAL boot camp, and feeling like I was doing a pretty good job, and that I had overall a really easy baby. I felt like I understood him from the start and could meet his needs, and that felt wonderful.

I do remember (just remembered, actually) lying awake at night imagining who I could kill if it meant saving my baby. I determined that I would shoot any adult, but not any kid. Because I wouldn't want to take away someone else's baby. Was that rational thinking? Not really. It wasn't likely that a crazy killer was going to capture me and say, "Either kill your husband or your baby," or, "Kill this stranger, or your baby," but that's what kept me up. I also instructed my husband that if it came down to a choice between saving me or the baby, he'd better save the baby. I guess I wanted to make sure I had all my bases covered. It was scary having something that I would totally die for, and I guess I was getting used to that. (My husband didn't appear to share my urgency in planning for these hypothetical events, which I found very annoying.)

Fortunately, those hormone surges go away, although you still get the nice rush of breastfeeding hormones that totally relax you when you feed the baby. Now that's a good drug, totally legal, no prescription needed. Click here to read full entry.

Breastfeeding: Wish I'd Heard More Good Things!

This month I’m thrilled to be participating in Blacktating’s Carnival of Breastfeeding, where moms contribute posts on a theme. This month’s theme is “If I’d Known Then…” Links to other blogger’s thoughts on the topic are at the end of this post.

I’ve been breastfeeding for almost seven months now, and it’s been so much cooler than I expected. I wish I’d known ahead of time how wonderful and easy breastfeeding could be.

I’d heard terrible things about breastfeeding; how it hurt, how it was hard - general doomsday stuff. But I had a hunch it could be OK, because on my visits to my sister I saw her breastfeed my nephews and niece and it didn’t look that awful. In fact, she made it look easy. Maybe it will be that easy for me, I thought to myself. But when I was pregnant and people asked me, “Are you going to breastfeed?” I’d say, very casually, “I’m going to try.” I’d heard so many stories of failure that I dared not hope I’d be able to manage it. I think I also didn’t want to hear any more bad stories about breastfeeding, so I tried to give the most noncommittal answer possible. Now I hate to think of how wishy-washy I sounded, and I wish that I could have given a more confident answer.

So far I am amazed by how much I have enjoyed breastfeeding. I didn’t know that in those tired days after the baby is born, breastfeeding makes pleasant hormones course through your body. I didn’t know how breastfeeding teaches you to read your baby so well. I didn’t know how it was so convenient to be able to feed the baby at a restaurant, in the car, or while walking around Target without having to do anything but adjust my shirt. I didn’t know how easy breastfeeding made life with a baby. You can pacify a baby on a 6 hour flight to CA with hardly any effort. I had no idea! You can let a fussy baby nurse for an hour straight when nothing else works… and you can lie down doing it! Does it get much easier for an exhausted mom?

Don’t get me wrong. We’ve had a few problems: bruised nipples from a bad latch at day five (my fault, not the baby’s), clogged ducts at month three, and a decreased supply after the baby nursed poorly at month five when he had a bad flu. I got through it all with the help of the lactation consultants at my local hospital. I cannot say enough about how much they have helped me. I was also lucky enough not to be working, so I had plenty of time at home to resolve the issues with little outside demands on me.

There are a few other things I wish I’d known. I knew I didn’t want many visitors at the hospital so I could focus on feeding the baby, but I didn’t know that even having a few visitors would impact my ability to feed my baby on demand. The baby was fussing while company was there, and I tried everything else except feeding him to calm him down. I was still too new at breastfeeding to be able to nurse in front of people I wasn’t fully comfortable with, and plus, I didn’t really understand that my baby was fussing because he was hungry. I couldn’t fully fathom that babies needed to eat ALL THE TIME those first days. I think back to how I rocked and shushed him until the visitors left, and I feel terrible because now I realize I ignored my baby’s hunger signals. I have to wonder if that’s why my milk took an extra day or two to come in, which made the baby a bit jaundiced and the doctor worry about his weight. It worked out fine, but with the next baby, I’ll do a better job of feeding the baby often right from the start.

I also wish I’d heard about cluster feedings before I experienced them. It’s hard to believe a baby would nurse for three hours straight… until midnight, 1 am, and a couple times, 2 am. It’s easy to start thinking you don’t have enough milk. A couple times we even broke into the formula cans we’d received in the mail and made a bottle, but each time, I looked at the bottle and said, “I’ll feed him just a little more.” I kept nursing him and eventually he fell asleep. If I weren’t such a stubborn person, I would have used the formula, and in doing so, possibly not allowed my breasts to know how much milk the baby really needed from me. Breastfeeding is a leap of faith, and you have to trust both yourself and the baby. If you trust that your baby really is hungry, even if it’s only been an hour or two after the last feed, the milk supply will most likely follow. My lactation consultant emphasized that theme in the hospital’s New Mothers group, and that lesson of listening to the baby and reading his signals has driven pretty much all of my breastfeeding decisions since then.

I hope to be able to spread the good word about breastfeeding. I know some people have a hard time, but for me, it has been intuitive, calming, and yes- easy. I don’t want other people to end up with a long list of “things I wish I’d known,” so I offer simple advice to my friends who are pregnant. I tell them to line up a lactation consultant ahead of time, so they know they can call someone in the morning for help (after a 3 am freakout!). I also tell them to get a copy of The Nursing Mother’s Companion, which I think is one of the easiest to use and most organized breastfeeding books. I think every nursing mother needs support, even the ones who have a relatively easy time like me.

Read other mothers' stories:

--When breastfeeding begins badly, and what I should have done about it by The Milk Mama

--What I Wish I'd Known Back Then About Breastfeeding by Christina at Massachusetts Friends of Midwives

--If I'd Known Then... by Whozat

--You don't have to grin and bear it by Melodie at Breastfeeding Moms Unite!

--Robin Elise Weiss at Birth Activist

--Barbara at Three Girl Pile Up

--Adria at Happy Bambino

--What I Wish I'd Known Then: A Poem by Lisa at My World Edenwild

--AP Principle #2: What I wish I'd known when I started breastfeeding by Hobo Mama

--I wish I would've known! by strwberryjoy (Maria)

--Rebekah at Momma's Angel

--Breastfeeding Mums: 15 Breastfeeding Facts I Wish I'd Known as a First Time Breastfeeding Mum

--Rita at Fighting Off Frumpy: When Breastfeeding Feels Wrong

--Cave Mother: Nursing Wisdom

--Breastfeeding 1-2-3: Trust Yourself and Your Body

--Breastfeeding is life changing at Blacktating

--Claire at Mum Unplugged
Click here to read full entry.

One Thing I Wish I'd Known About Breastfeeding

I'd wish I'd heard about cluster feeding, where, in preparation for sleep, the baby NURSES HIS HEAD OFF FOR LIKE THREE HOURS. The reason this is an issue is:
1. You cannot fathom that your baby needs to nurse AGAIN.
2. Your spouse has just gotten home and wants to hang out with you/eat with you
3. You begin to think you have no milk.

What you need to do is just sit on your butt and nurse, but it is so hard because you really feel like you need to be putting on a good, cheery face for your husband. I am so glad that my husband and I realized that evenings might not be so easy and like they used to be. In those first few weeks, if the baby fell asleep at 7, rather than hang out with Corey, I'd go sleep too. I mean, it's total guerrilla tactics, but to survive and thrive as first time parents, you have to do crazy things like nap from 7-9 pm. (Because your damn baby is gonna want to nurse non-stop from 9 to midnight.)

I was just reminded of this when reading Nina Planck's Real Food for Mom and Baby. Yeah, I'm a hippie.
And this is me nursing Q when he was a couple weeks old, not in my nursing nook, but in the living room, still in maternity clothes, of course!

My biggest tip for cluster feeding is:
1. Get an awesome nursing pillow so you can nurse hands free
2. Get a laptop or a book and set it right in front of your nursing chair- better yet, get all the trashy tabloid mags, because your brain is fried.
3. Get a system, like unlimited texting for the iPhone, so you can summon your husband or mom to refill your water bottle, bring you socks for your freezing feet, or whatever.

I finally read "Bringing Your Newborn Home" AS I was nursing in those first few weeks when I was nursing 5, 6 hours a day, letting Q nurse as long as he wanted.

Letting your baby nurse as long as he wants is good for:
1. Making sure he gets to the fattier hindmilk at the end of the feed
2. Stimulating your prolactin receptors so you will always have enough milk in the later months of nursing
3. You, relaxing, reading, while the baby does his thing.

All that stuff about "don't let your baby use you as a pacifier" does NOT apply to the first month or two. Your baby is hard at work making your boobs into nursing boobs, and you need to ignore pressure from the outside world who say, "Didn't you just feed him?" "He's just using you as a pacifier." "Are you sure you have enough milk?" This is the kind of stuff that makes you feel bad about your nursing capabilities, when really, you are ROCKING IT.

Here are a couple of my fave nursing shots from the first month or two:

Nursing Q while visiting our friends Daniel and Zaida, who had their twins a few weeks after Q.









Nursing while watching Biggest Loser with my friends/coworkers. I swear, I nursed ALL THE TIME in that first month or two! Time or place, didn't matter. Just wanted that baby to gain weight.




The one thing I'm going to do differently with my next baby is nurse him or her more often in the first 24 hours. Long story, don't feel like getting into it right now.
Click here to read full entry.

Breastfeeding: Way Better Than I Expected

I thought breastfeeding was going to stink because I'd heard such bad things about it. I did have a problem or two during the first week, but I got help on day 5 from the lactation consultant at the hospital and she got me back on track.
There is a lot I could say about this subject, but I'll summarize and say that I've been surprised at how I've felt about breastfeeding.

For example, at Baby Q's two month appointment, the nurse said, "You're breastfeeding?"
"Yup!" I said.
"Any supplements?"
"Nope!" And I was surprised by the rush of pride I felt at telling her, it's just my milk. It's just my milk that's making this baby grow.

I was also surprised at how angry I was- just a flash of anger that I quickly tamped down because I knew it was unnecessary- when my husband suggested giving Baby Q an ounce or two of formula one night when Q was being cranky and wanting to eat and eat and not fall asleep. This was about a month ago.
Me (tired, at end of rope, approaching 11pm): "I don't know why this baby won't go to bed!"
Corey: "Well, do you want to give him some formula?"
He had heard that formula makes babies sleep, and I think he was also thinking I was tired of breastfeeding Q.
Me (feeling really pissed for a second, then realizing that was a crazy way to feel): "Mmmm... No. I'll just keep feeding him."

I forget how the rest of the conversation went, but I felt inside me a renewed determination to trust that my baby was hungry and just needed to eat, or needed me to help him go to sleep, or just wasn't tired. I let my husband make the bottle in case I did lose it, but I kept breastfeeding Q, and he fell asleep.
And actually, I wasn't angry at my husband- I was angry at myself for getting frustrated with my baby. And I was very, very tired. But being told I had a way out reminded me that I did not want that way out. Rationally, I understand that formula is fine, but I didn't want to open that avenue for fear I'd rely on it, lessen my milk production, and be unable to breastfeed my baby.

I don't mean to make my husband look bad. Several other times, when Q was being cranky and wanting to eat and eat, the conversation went like this:
Me (tired, at end of rope, approaching 11pm): "I don't know why this baby won't go to bed! He just wants to eat and eat. Maybe I don't have enough milk."
Corey: "He's just a growing boy."
This happened more than once: me questioning if I had enough milk, and my husband saying, sure you do.
And I think I do. The baby is growing, so... it's all working out.

Breastfeeding is hard because you really have to trust yourself and your baby. You have to trust that you have milk, and you have to trust that your baby is hungry if he wants to eat. (Even though it's like, the 6th hour of breastfeeding that day. Believe me- I kept track of the minutes the first few weeks.)
There is a big learning curve with breastfeeding. The first couple weeks are hard because you're tired, you're sore, you're worn out, you're hormonal. It really smooths out after the first month though. And I'd say, from the beginning, it went well for me, because I headed off the couple of problems I encountered the first week by visiting and calling the lactation consultants. I love them.

You've also got to have the right supplies for breastfeeding:
1. Brest Friend nursing pillow
2. Medela lanolin for your sore boobs (that goes away after a few weeks)
3. Boob pads- I prefer disposable bc I haven't found washables that I like
4. Good nursing cover so you can feed your hungry baby when your husband's friends are over
5. Trashy magazines, laptop, iPhone, so you always have something fun to do while baby is on the boob (TV is OK, but I don't like my baby to hear TOO much crap while he's eating- plus our TV is downstairs and that couch is too deep to breastfeed comfortably)

I will say, here is what is stressful about breastfeeding: you're the only one who can do the job of feeding the kid. Frankly, I take great pride in that. I want to be the most important person in my kid's life. I'm selfish and obsessive like that. Plus, on a more practical level, I'm not working: breastfeeding is my job. I want to do that job. I think I'm good at it, so I feel good about doing it.
But it is hard being the one who has to get up every 2, 3, or 4 hours at night- you simply can't sleep if the baby wants to eat. That hasn't been a problem for me yet. I'm not working, and I'm not going to work until he's 10 months old. I don't feel stressed about getting him to sleep through the night yet. I'm perfectly fine feeding him whenever he wants to eat. It would be so shitty if I had to go back to work at 8 or 12 weeks. That would be really, really hard. My friends who do that have had to work harder at getting their baby on a better night schedule. It's not easy.
I do get tired. I do crave sleep really badly sometimes (right now, at 930 pm Friday, I'm fine. This morning at 6:30 am, I made my husband get up and change the baby, then bring him to me to feed in bed- and I swear, I slept during the three minutes my husband changed him. And yesterday morning around the same time, I vaguely recall saying, "Take him away so I can sleep." And I got a full 50 minutes of "don't have to worry about baby waking up because I'm not in charge of him right now" time.
If I do get worn down, I take action. I don't make plans for the day, and I make it a priority to get Q to sleep during the day (not always a guarantee). In the first month, I'd even skip dinner to sleep if I needed to, because I know how TERRIBLE I can be if I'm tired. I did have a rough week last week- I had trouble getting back to sleep at 1 am, then 4 am... and I did get worn down. But that's when you stop and reset: cancel the plans, stay at home for a day or two, get recharged.

But in general, the best advice I got, which wasn't advice, but it was how I set my mind after a billion people told me, "Sleep now while you can." That wasn't good advice. What 10 month pregnant lady can sleep? DUH!!! But that made me think I'd better treat infanthood like I was a Navy SEAL. You know, go in expecting hellish sleep deprivation, then be surprised at it being only a little worse than those college all-nighters. Or, maybe easier, but with added challenges of breastfeeding, hormones, and the insane thing that is the post-pregnancy body.

But I think maybe my baby's just easy. He's not colicky. He only cries if he's hungry or tired. If I take care of those two things, he's fine.

But oh, the boy does not like the car. He screams and shouts, I think because I often put him in the car when he's tired, because I've learned I can stay home for 6 hours trying to get him to nap, or I can go out, endure a car ride of crying, but then have him fall asleep in his sling while I'm shopping or walking. I'd be stuck at home all day if I didn't hear him cry. But oh, he gets hysterical in the car. It's bad. His crying makes me skin crawl.

God, I'm kind of boring myself. I just wanted to say that breastfeeding is pretty cool.

PS- you are allowed to drink while breastfeeding. Just don't drink on an empty stomach, or your body WILL use that to make the milk. Baby won't get drunk, but he may be irritable. So only drink if you have eaten and/or are eating. And don't get totally plastered. Click here to read full entry.