Coughing, Blogging, Not Sleeping, Rectal Kicks

Why lie in bed coughing at 3am, clutching your right boob, when you can be out in the living room blogging and eating a bowl of your favorite cereal with 2% milk?

That's what I say. I'm trying to remain positive despite coughing for close to 6 weeks now. Oh, the boob thing. Yes. I appear to have pulled a pec muscle from coughing, so now when I cough, my right chestal area has sharp pains. If I put pressure on the area, it feels better. Unless I'm holding a pillow, I can only apply pressure with my arms, resulting in boob clutching. I'm sure my students are wondering what the hell I'm doing, but at least I'm at work. You have to give me that.

Two weeks ago, I had a pulled side muscle. Just as that got better, the pec started hurting! Huh? I guess coughing a lot yesterday started it. Darn it, I thought I was better. I am feeling better, but I'm still coughing, and it's just getting OLD. I'll ask the pulmonologist about this tomorrow, since he only appears to work on Wednesdays.

Me to my stomach just now: "What are you doing?" Because I can see my stomach jumping around in the 3:20 am light of my laptop.
I've been getting some impressive kicks, and repeated nudges in low-lying areas, that make me say, "Yikes!" I really did not know the baby was going to kick me in the rectum and the cervix, but uh, I guess that makes sense. I'm sorry to have used the word rectum, but it had to be said. Click here to read full entry.

Discussing Pregnancy (and My Butt) with Students

Last week, at 27 weeks (close to 7 months), I told my students I was pregnant. Turns out 11 year olds are pretty funny to discuss pregnancy with.

Me, pointing to my stomach: Hey, have you guys noticed this?
They stare at me blankly: Huh?
Me, turning sideways and poking my stomach: This. Have you noticed this?
Kids are silent.
Me: There's a baby in there!
They start shouting at me. "You're pregnant? Is is a boy or a girl? How far along are you? What are you going to name him?"
I let them shout at me for a while, then we got back to work. (Note: In this photo, you can see I look pretty thick around the middle, rather than hugely pregnant. You can see why people would not assume I'm pregnant, but rather, just porking up.)

When I told my other class, they also started shouting things at me, but they shouted funnier things than the other class.
Two of the boys said, "I did notice, but I didn't want to say anything in case you weren't."
One girl said, "When did you find out you were pregnant?"
Me: "Uh, July 1st." (Did she really want specific dates? I was surprised by the question so I answered honestly.)
Another girl: "Are you tired? My mom said she was really tired when she was pregnant with me."
Another girl: "Why do people gain weight when they're pregnant?"
Me: "Oh, well, there's more than just the baby in there. There's more fluid, and there's more blood in your body, and... there's other stuff." (I was not prepared for that question, and other kids were shouting things, so I gave sort of a bad answer.  I guess I also wasn't sure if I felt like teaching them what a placenta is, either.)

Then, I told my study hall, which is only 3 kids, and one was absent, so it was just one boy and one girl. We were doing some work, and I said, "So, guys, my stomach is getting bigger. I'm pregnant."
Kids: "Oh cool, is it a boy or a girl, when are you due, etc."  We chatted a bit, then I got up to go get something from my desk.
Boy: "No offense, but your butt's getting bigger too."

No kids ever say stuff like that to me, and I never let kids do that, but you know what, I brought up my stomach size, so I can't really fault him for commenting on my body size. Anyway, my butt's not getting bigger, so his comment didn't bug me. I thought it was funny, but all I said was, "You are ridiculous." I don't want to give his antics any encouragement. This is the same kid who asked me if he could call me by my first name. He's a great kid, but a bit fresh!

The next time I saw my study hall, the third student, another boy, was there.  I pulled out my cold medicine with codeine, because I was feeling like crap from my cough.
Boy, alarmed: "I thought you couldn't take medicine when you were pregnant!" (How do they know all this?)
Me: "Nah, that's just your first trimester."
Boy: "What? Your what?"
Me: "Trimester- first three months."
Boy: "What the- how many months are you?"
Me: "Almost seven!"
Boy: "Really? You don't look it. How long have you been pregnant?"
Me: "Um, since June?"
Fresh boy: "What day? What day in June?"
Me: "Um, June 11th?"
Fresh boy: "Oh my god my birthday is the 13th!"
Me, trying to get over the fact that I'm somehow discussing, with preteen boys, the date I conceived my child: "Uh... cool!"

I took some photos of my butt the other day,
a) because I like these jeans but they are too small and I don't think they ever actually fit me- they're medium and I should have gotten large
b) because I am pretty sure my butt's not really getting bigger. I'm putting on a layer of fat from my knees to my shoulders, but the butt is not getting disproportionately larger.
c) and because I just sort of wanted to get a look at my butt.

Turns out it's pretty challenging to photograph your own butt.





Here's a pic of my stomach, actually looking pregnant, but my stomach rarely looks like this. The way I was turning made my stomach stick out more. Usually, I look sorta normal, and I can still get away with just looking like I've gained weight. For real, I can. Click here to read full entry.

28 Weeks: 3 Months to Go

I find it hard to believe that this is actually what's in my stomach. I feel so good, except for this cough, that it's hard to believe I'm pregnant. If it weren't for the kicking, I'd just think I was plumping up. I probably am plumping up, because I have not exercised in oh, 6 weeks, because of my cough and icky feeling. And I ate a lot of sugar cookies this weekend. And a lot of Mexican food yesterday. And two cookies from the school cafeteria yesterday. And one today. Plus mac and cheese. My arms are looking fat for the first time in years. That's OK. I don't care too much. As long as my maternity jeans keep fitting.

I passed my glucose test, so I don't have pregnancy-induced diabetes. COOL! Click here to read full entry.

Napping: Difficult But Worth It

"A cup of strong coffee might make you feel wide awake, but a small study suggests that for improved physical and mental performance, an afternoon nap works better." OK, but then the short article goes on to say the subjects napped from 1-3pm. That's not a NAP, that's a full on siesta. Of course you're going to rock out on cognitive tests after going through a full REM cycle, but how is that going to be applied practically? Who's gonna nap for two hours on anything but a weekend?

The weekday is when you need a nap to get all the annoying money-earning cognition done. But in a weekday, you're lucky if you can find a way to close your eyes for 20 minutes. You have to have an office door you can lock- or, if you are really desperate, be the type who can recline the driver's seat of the car and sleep.

Luckily, I can do both, and I always have a free period in the afternoon. (Well, a period with no students where I'm supposed to get actual work done.) I used to get sinus infections a lot, and I had to nap to make it through the day. I need that less, but I still keep all my napping supplies handy. Sometimes, to survive that last hour of work with 26 energetic and/or lethargic pre-teens, I just have to lie down and let my brain rest.
Here's how I do it:

1. I always put a rug in my classroom so I have a good napping surface- I kid you not.
2. At 1:05 pm, I lock my classroom door, shut the shades, and get out my napping pad and pillow. The napping pad is a superthick exercise mat.
3. I set my phone alarm, cover myself with my jacket, and curl up and try to fall asleep. My closet is a little too small to keep a blanket and a pillow, so the coat works fine.

Sometimes I don't actually fall asleep, but the full-on body relaxation helps me feel better, and at least I know I tried. And, even if I wake up feeling groggy, I know I got a little rest, and I take solace in that and muddle through.

Occasionally a co-worker will ask to borrow my napping pad and/or just lie on my rug, because for some reason, teachers insist on going to work when we're sick, or maybe we're just sick a lot. I'm freaking sick right now. I managed to sleep for two hours tonight before my coughing took over. That's why I'm writing this at 1:33 am. I couldn't stop coughing and I felt bad for keeping my husband up, so I might as well enjoy myself out in the living room. My friend/co-worker is sleeping in our guest bed, because even though I'm still sick, I feel better than I have the past few weeks, so we did our weekly Tuesday "Biggest Loser" girls' TV and gossip night.

If I go to work tomorrow, which I think I will, I can guarantee you I'll use that napping pad. Just knowing I have it makes me able to go in to work, because I know there are two parts of the day where I can try to nap for 30 minutes. It involves skipping meetings and/or not getting work done, but it means I can make it through the day- and maybe even be a good teacher while I'm at it.

I love napping. I have always been very good at it, and have even been known to set my alarm and get into bed for just 5 minutes at a time in my life when I really needed some extra sleep (counselor at an amazing writing camp for high schoolers). Even those few minutes of eye closure refreshed me, and then I was off to teach my Irish dancing or video magazine elective- two things I knew almost nothing about, but learned enough to teach. 

I can nap anywhere- Starbucks, outdoors, my car, the couch, in front of people- I don't care.

Shoot! I Just saw this napping kit, and got excited, then I realized it's for a BABY! Adults need napping kits too, and that's why I keep my napping arsenal at work.


Related article:
"Some Respect, Please, for the Afternoon Nap" by Lisa Belkin about napping at work. Click here to read full entry.

Using Obama to Cheer Myself Up

I was driving home from work Wednesday, feeling very blah and icky. I've had a nasty cough for a month, and I wasn't feeling well. Then the thought crossed my mind, "We elected Obama. We elected a black president." And I felt happy, or at least happier than I had felt a second ago. I'm getting pretty down from having this cough- I coughed so hard Monday that I pulled a muscle in my side, so now, not only am I coughing, the coughing really hurts, and it hurts to sit up, and even if I start feeling better, I'm not going to be able to do full-body workouts. I'm pissed off.

I found a site that has some great pics of Obama. I have always loved photographs, and this series by Callie Shell at Digital Journalist is particularly good. She has followed Barack for a couple of years for Time, so the photos evolve from Obama doing tiny appearances two years ago, to speaking in front of hundreds of thousands. Pretty cool. Make sure you get all the way to the photo of him doing pullups before a speech. I'm sorry, but the man is a riot. Click here to read full entry.

Batch Cooking: Healthy Eating for the Lazy

I first discovered batch-cooking with the book Diet Simple, and I've been doing it for years now. You make a bunch of soup/stew, then freeze it in containers so you have a couple weeks of healthy lunch or dinners. Since my husband will go nowhere near my vegetable-laden stews, I eat mine at lunch. My current batch is eliciting a lot of oohs, ahhs, and "What's in that? It looks so good"s from my co-workers, so I thought I'd share. Basically, it's zucchini, (pre-cut) squash, white bean, bulgur, spinach, cans of diced tomatoes and chicken broth. The only hard part of this non-recipe is chopping the onion and slicing the zucchini. Other than that, get out your biggest pot, open the cans, and cut open the bags of organic veggies. The recipe is impossible to mess up. Note: the squash made this a bit too sweet. I'd use less next time or use carrots instead.

The nice thing about this recipe is that you can vary it easily. Make it more Italian by using tomatoes with Italian flavor and elbow noodles. Make it chili-like by using tomatoes with chili peppers, black beans, and chili powder and cumin. In fact, that's the batch I'm snacking on right now as I write this post: my tofu chili batch with black and kidney beans that I made a month ago. It's only 9 am and I'm already getting nutrients and phytochemicals. I added Mexican cheese and it's out of control good.

Basic recipe:
1. Chop onion, slice a few zucchini (anywhere from 2-5).
2. Saute onion a minute or two, toss in zucchini, stir, saute a few minutes.
3. Dump in a can or two of flavored diced tomatoes, flavor of your choice.
4. Dump in as much chicken broth as you want. If you're using potatoes or squash, let it boil lightly on medium for 20 minutes. Or 30, whatever works.
5. When you have like ten minutes left of cooking, add the bulgur wheat. This grain is super-high in protein and cooks as easily as pasta. Boil it lightly for a minute or two, then turn it to simmer for 10 minutes. Or 20 if you get distracted.
6. Throw in a block of frozen organic spinach. Simmer for 5 minutes or until melted.
7. Turn off burner, remove pot from heat, let cool for 30 minutes or an hour or whatever.
8. Put into containers and freeze. Should make 8 or more 2 cup portions.

Another nice thing about this recipe is that you need very few fresh ingredients, so you can kind of make it whenever, without much planning. The zucchini, though, is pretty key for me, and I never make these soups without it. If organic red peppers were not $9 a pound, I'd include those. I've been going organic on red peppers, apples, spinach and strawberries since those are among the highest in pesticide.

I used to include more meat in these, but I've been feeling grossed out by reheated meats in the past year or so, so I no longer include turkey burger in my chili or diced turkey in my white bean soup. It's not worth the skeevy factor to me. Click here to read full entry.

Celebrity Pregnancy Move

I'm cracking myself up at work. My students don't know I'm pregnant yet, and I figure I have at least 2-3 more weeks before it gets more obvious to them. But it's not them I'm worried about. It's their parents. For them, I've got a new move that I've learned from celebrities.
Whenever I see a mom volunteering in the library or main office, I shift whatever I am carrying in front of my stomach. Thursday I used a manila folder, and Tuesday at a parent meeting, my purse. One day, I wore a scarf long down my front. I'm sure they have not noticed a thing.

I'm not telling my students yet because... well, I don't want to break the illusion that they're stuck with me all year. There's a power in that. The classroom is based on the fact that they are under my control all year, and they know that. They know that they are my little captives. When I say read, they read. If I say close your eyes, they close their eyes. When I say do the hokey-pokey, they do it. But when they know I'll be leaving them in March, I'm afraid something will change, and my undisputed rule will be shaken somehow.

Also, it's just fun to have a secret, and go around with a large stomach, and pretend like it's not there. Click here to read full entry.

Ladies in Khakis: I've Had It!

As I've been borrowing people's maternity clothes, a fair number of khakis have come my way. I put on a pair and noted that I look like I'm manning a ride at an amusement park. (Emphasis on the verb "man.") Today at work, I was walking behind two coworkers wearing khakis. I knew then that I needed to make a public statement: khakis, I'm sorry, do not look good on anyone.

The khakis to the right look OK. But she's slim, these are more cream than khaki, and she's wearing yellow heels. That's called "stylish." Most people I catch wearing khakis don't have modelesque figures, and they are wearing true khaki-colored khakis. Khaki = ugly brown. The khakis are slightly baggy, making their figures look droopy. Those kinds of khakis are called "dumpy."

To all you readers who are wearing khakis, I need you to either
a) not care that you are wearing ugly pants, because you are married and OK with looking bad
or
b) take a good look at yourself in the mirror and ask if the pants are really the best for your figure. Pretty soon, you're going to be old, and your butt is not going to look as good as it does now. Do you really want to clothe your ass, in its last good ten years, in unstylish khakis from the GAP?

If you under age 23, and very slim, and wearing flip flops, you may wear khakis without question. If either of these is an issue for you, though, you need to consider the two options above. Chances are, you, like me, should not be wearing khakis, unless they cost $300 and are from say, Theory, or some other fancy designer most of us can't afford. If you are a khaki devotee, you should sincerely consider shelling out the cash. Click here to read full entry.

Tupelo--> Memphis--> LaGuardia!

God I love the Tupelo airport. The same people who check you in are the ones who flag your plane in, drive your luggage to the plane, and do the final boarding. I got some good small talk with the security lady about how much weight her friend gained when she was pregnant, and the guy at the counter/luggage driver (who is actually right now flagging my plane over in the rainy dusk) got my boarding pass for me. My little prop jet is pulling in right now. Better run.

Had a great visit with my family and got to make fancy pancakes yesterday!
Oh, and Tupelo airport has free wi-fi!
Click here to read full entry.

Obama!

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! This is what I wanted to see!
There are so many great photos at the New York Times site. Really, it's a moment that needs to be documented. One of my favorite pics is of Jesse Jackson in tears. I loved Obama's acceptance speech- the fact that he tells his kids they can get a puppy.

I don't feel good, but one reason I'm going in to work is so I can be around people because I want to hear what they have to say about this!

I never thought I'd see a black President this soon. I'm a little annoyed that we're labeling him black, since he's also white, but whatever.

Augh they are such a good looking Presidential family!!! Click here to read full entry.